Horoscopes 2013

ARIES(March 21-April 19) A kindled fire is a sacred thing—at least it once was. With nothing but darkness, fear and monsters pervading the atmosphere, light (fire, rather) brought with it hope, power and strength. In the coming months I urge you to review how it is fire is made. Return to its prehistoric roots and consider: born of sun or stone; carried by air, fire transmits light energy and creates. So tell me, Aries, what one thing would you create if you could anything? How would you manage it? Where would you take it? Then trust me when I say you already have the wherewithal in you. And if you can render one true thing from absolutely nothing, I promise you, a mini-civilization of your own will come up. Remember: Fire is the only element that can completely eliminate physical form into nothingness. Purify the past and illuminate your future.  

TAURUS (April 20-May 20) Nursery rhymes intrigue me, Taurus. They come off real sweet like lullabies, but are often cruel. Of course, grounded in folk tradition and sometimes political satire, they don’t have much of a choice. They’re mean because they’re unafraid of reality and shatter illusion. And the best part is we read them to children. Still, at its heart that cute, chubby little nursery rhyme is a lot more like its twisted cousin, the Riddle, than Hello Kitty. Let this be a reminder to you as you catch slippery lies, hold up truths and study the origin of all your hunches this year. And if your investigations yield unsavoury answers then learn to present them with cool diplomacy. Unexpressed truths deserve an outlet but this year you’ll learn the art of getting what you want without a temper but with intelligence.

GEMINI (May 21-June 20) “Mind you, sometimes the angels smoke, hiding it with their sleeves, and when the archangel comes, they throw the cigarettes away: that’s when you get shooting stars.” So wrote Nabokov in a letter to his wife of nearly fifty years, Vera. My interest in this statement lies far beyond its theological implications to the heart of its playful poetry. There’s something grand about perfect, immortal beings indulging their vices; being bad. Like Nabokov’s angels, I suggest you start the year by transmuting your darkness into splendour.  But in order to do so you’re going to have to hold a remarkable tension. You see, this year isn’t a plateau for you, Gemini. You must master light and shadow by tempting possibility out of emptiness and seeing beyond illusions. Consider the Summer a whirlwind season testing your sincerity, integrity and sanity. Pass through this cycle and fortune will rain on you and your loved ones by next Winter. Godspeed.

 

CANCER (June 21-July 22) “Love is a stranger in an open car/Tempt you in and drive you far away,” sings beautiful Annie Lennox. As of late, I’ve been assuaging nostalgia cravings for classic pop by revisiting beloved gay icons like Annie. It’s been a great trip. And whether you like it or not Love is a Stranger might as well be your anthem this year. You see, it’s not just about following your heart it’s about letting yourself become seduced by your own potential. Possibility looms where fear is abandoned for the thrill. In 2013 get into the car with your strangers—people, hobbies, anything—and let them take you far, far away. In a sense I’m telling you to run away with yourself and be unapologetic. The one negative feeling I urge you to abandon on the highway is guilt. Let guilt become your psyche’s emotional roadkill cause it won’t do you any good this year. Live for yourself, Cancer. One day you may even look back and realize you took the first step in revolutionizing a whole new way of being for yourself.

LEO (July 23-August 22) Justice may seem a fickle thing, but it reigns supreme on a karmic level. So what do you have to worry about? Okay fine, even if Wavy Gravy’s school of thought isn’t for you, the point I’m trying to make is you can, in spite of all the changes the year holds for you, tap into the kinda revelatory calm that maintains wicked harmony in your Life. While passionate chaos is a necessary ingredient for living, your overall mood should be mellow. Center yourself. Can you really focus on detachment this year, Leo? While wary of suggesting this now popular concept in modern psychology and spirituality because it often breeds complacency, I don’t think we’re gonna have that problem here. You have too much heart to be complacent about anything. But if you learn to soar above damning situations that seem unbearable and toxic through the art of detachment you will discover vital wisdom. You’re on the threshold now and a new cycle is about to begin but you must prove you’re well-rooted before the shift can occur.

VIRGO (August 23-September 22) I’ve always been fascinated with ancestry. I love family sagas and can usually guess a person’s origins with one look. For the most part I’m bang-on and sometimes I’m dead wrong, but I’ve always felt connected with this concept. Now an old woman once told me this was a wise fascination. She believed our ancestors regularly checked in with us to ensure our happiness. Hm, I wonder if you'd humour the idea this year, Virgo? Try to understand what it is you want by retrieving your roots. What if your ancestors were checking in on you? This mental game may give you the strength to take an important risk this year. It's when we consider our individuality in the context of the collective that we begin to understand what it can mean to embrace it. Keep relationships smooth and functional both at home and at work. From these solid connections you'll find the strength to start doing what you were born to do.

 LIBRA (September 23-October 22) Ever hear of phantom limb pain? Maybe even experienced it? It’s when an amputated limb feels like it’s still there and hurts. Recently, badass neuroscientist Vilayanaur S. Ramachandran introduced Mirror Box Therapy—a system that allows patients to use the reflection of a healthy limb as a substitute for the amputated one. Believe it or not this concept is the perfect metaphor for your life in 2013. You will be presented with ample opportunities to seize your potential, but must be willing to let go of haunted memories. In fact, I predict all your unbelievable breaks will be tied into something from your past. You have to let go, Libra. Better yet, use the mirror box analogy to your advantage and start seeing and believing the incomplete aspects of your Life are whole. Your greatest breakthroughs will come from removing your potential from the grasp of yesterday’s perceived failures. You must slay your demons this year and you can only do so by embracing them.

SCORPIO (October 23-November 21) Okay, fine. So I’m gonna get the big guns out for you, Scorpio! If there’s one thing you can do this year it’s speak your truths. Don’t tell me that’s too cryptic cause nothing’s too cryptic for a Scorpio and you know it. What I want you to do is speak from a place so open, so cool, so truly you inside yourself you can’t help but articulate your desires, wishes and dreams. Words can do so much for us but when spoken with intention they’re sheer magic. Ask yourself what you want to do then say it out loud; let people know and be unafraid of scrutiny and judgement. Initiate this process in February by doing a little soul searching then actively embrace this verbal reconstruction of yourself in March. But remember, what you say carries weight. Proceed with caution. Make this a habit and mark my words: You will be unstoppable.

SAGITTARIUS (November 22-December 21) What do William Blake, Walt Disney and Frank Zappa all have in common? All dead? Yes. All Sagis? Obviously. All visionary geniuses ahead of their times? Hell yes. This year, Sagi, I want you to build. But not just anything. This year you'll select a project—it can be a house, business, painting, whatever—I don’t care—and you'll build it. But in order to do so you’ll form the blueprint from your imagination. You see, it’s true that Sagi is a natural traveller, but that journey-seeking Sagittarian curiosity isn’t reserved for Mount Kilimanjaro or Bali alone—it represents Sagi’s ability to traverse the internal world. And the deeper you go, charting new terrain and picking up new ideas, the further ahead you’ll be in your daily life. This is a year of mobility, just make sure you’re prepared. And let the following words by William Blake guide you: I must create a system or be enslaved by another man's: my business is to create.

CAPRICORN (December 22-January 19) Don’t get me started on my love for vintage Kung Fu films. Unsurprisingly, the old martial arts classic Way of the Dragon, starring Bruce Lee, is a particular favourite. I wonder, Capricorn, would you be willing to use this film as your guide to 2013? You see, this year you have some real curve balls headed your way so it’s imperative that you remain balanced. Like any true martial arts superstar your mind-body-soul trinity must be perfectly aligned in order to dodge Life’s kicks and irregular jump-starts. Are you up for the challenge? I suspect you are. And although I encourage you to be disciplined, flexible and noble like our hero I demand you consider how, in spite of the violence and Chinese pop philosophy, this film isn’t all that serious. It’s actually a Comedy. More than all the other signs you need to focus on humour and lightness this year. Be light on your feet and your heart will follow.

AQUARIUS (January 20-February 18) A girlfriend recently told me her Aquarian friend has an intense foot fetish. A bit foot-phobic herself she was both intrigued and repulsed by his passion and speculated whether it was evidence that Aquarians are a bit strange. In all fairness, Aquarians can be rather eccentric, yet many stay humbly, loyally true to “the box”. And who can blame them? Society doesn’t make life easy outside it. Still, quirks, fetishes and passions colour character and make people interesting. In the words of writer, Alice Sebold, “inhabit your weirdness.”  By doing so you gain admission into a very different way of thinking which in turn invites a new way of being. Let the big picture guide your decision-making in 2013. Follow it into the horizon and let you screwball ideas take you there. I'm giving you a full license to a zanier way of living cause in your genius your fortune lies, Aquarius. 

PISCES (February 19-March 20) Do you know why people find Pisceans frustrating? Cause they can come off real subtle. It’s a gift, sure. Nothing like subtlety to get you outta hot water with, say, Colombian drug lords or an angry wife, but it also pisses people off. Know why? It makes them feel dumb.  If you don’t present your potential from the upstart, Pisces, people typically presume you know less than you do. This gives them an opportunity to exercise some bravado until they realize you’re just being unflashy. And as great as it is not to come off too strong I can’t stress the importance of putting yourself out there. This year requires action, productivity and the refusal to stand idly by in silence. In fact, here’s an exercise I know most of you will hate but should do: Every week make a point of telling at least one person one of your accomplishments. This practice will help break the ice because you really have to be the change.  So stop chasing your dreams and start believing them.